Speaking of that particular number, Julie Harris, one of Broadway's greatest and most dignified icons, had herself quite a laugh the other day at the National Arts Club. Miss Harris was being honored with a special reading of "The Member of the Wedding," the play that put her on the map. At one point, surrounded by such other distinguished women as Patricia Neal, Tammy Grimes and Elizabeth Wilson, Julie was approached by a fan. "Miss Harris, I just wanted to tell you how much I've always loved you, and I've always remembered how sensational you were in 'Gypsy' as Tessie Tura!"

Miss Harris kept her composure, thanked the gentleman, but was sorry to inform him that she had never belted out, "If you wanna grind it, wait 'til you've refined it!"

However, this odd memory of things that never happened reminded the actress of when she went to an audition for a movie with Paul Newman. "They wanted me to play an older woman, who had once been a hooker. But when I went in to meet with them, they said, 'Oh, no, no, you'll never do. You'll 'upclass' the part!"'

In fact, Miss Harris went on to play a skanky drug addict-chanteuse in Paul Newman's "Harper," and she was as convincingly disreputable as could be. You know what? She probably (ITALICS) would (END ITALICS) have bumped brilliantly in the role of Tessie. Acting!

ONE WEEK ONLY! We do mean multiple Grammy winner Alanis Morissette in the critically acclaimed Off-Broadway play, "The Exonerated." Morissette, who has acted in "Dogma" and "Sex in the City," begins her run Tuesday and goes until Dec. 7.

THEY'RE HERE! They're queer! They're everywhere! Bravo's Fab Five, of course. Tonight at on VH1's "Big in '03" special, you'll see Liza Minnelli present the "Queer Eye for the Straight Guy" cast an award for "Biggest Gay Hero." The boys were thrilled to meet Minnelli and vice versa. Also on the "Queer" front, Carson Kressley, the over-the-top fashion guy, just interviewed Cher for his new US Weekly column. Up next -- Bette Midler. On his wish list -- Madonna.

NEW YORK music lovers know the amazing 20-year-old singer-pianist Peter Cincotti. Actually, a good deal of the country knows Cincotti. His debut album was a big hit. He was just seen performing during the Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade and is featured in People magazine's "Sexiest Man Alive" issue.

Now, the kid's going to be a movie star. Cincotti is currently in Berlin filming his first speaking part in a movie, cast opposite Kevin Spacey in "Beyond the Sea." This is Spacey's labor of love, a biopic on the late pop star Bobby Darin. Spacey plays Darin (and will do his own singing). Cincotti plays Darin's friend and arranger. Peter says, "I'm getting lessons from one of the greatest actors in the world. I guess it's working, because my part keeps getting bigger!" The movie also stars Kate Bosworth, John Goodman, Brenda Blethyn, Cathy Moriarty and Bob Hoskins. Directed by Spacey, "Beyond the Sea" is set for a late 2004 release.

Cincotti makes his Lincoln Center debut next February, when he performs two concerts at Alice Tully Hall. His second album hits stores in June.

COURT TV's Catherine Crier, an ex-judge in Texas, is happy these days with her guy, James Logan. He is a big deal in the health care systems at NASA's Johnson Space Center.

Court TV naturally leads us to think of Michael Jackson. (The crime network, like all other cable outlets, is flipping its lid over the scandal.) Though the press is even more bloodthirsty than it was back in 1993, when child-molesting allegations first surfaced, I find "regular" people a bit more skeptical this time around. Perhaps Michael's year-after-year, blind free fall into dysfunction and isolation has made him a figure to be more pitied than instantly reviled.

But make no mistake, for all his weird ways, Michael is also clever. Part Bambi, part Napoleon, with a Christ complex thrown in. He knows how to work that vulnerability for his own benefit. He knows how to be ruthless. (Peter Pans do not build multimillion-dollar empires.) As for those who ask why hasn't anybody shaken some sense into him, well, these people obviously have never encountered a self-absorbed superstar. Nobody wants to walk away from the money and cachet attendant with intimacy to such a stellar light.